DA Recovery Is The Answer To A Family Disease
“Acceptance proved to be the key to my problem…”
I did not have a problem with money. My late husband had a problem with money. He would overspend compulsively and then try to cut back all at once. I never had the problems he did, but when he asked me to cut back, I would go out and buy something. But I did not have a problem with money.
After my husband died, I cut up about 15 credit cards of his. I only kept four or five “just in case…!” I was determined not to lose control over my money, but whenever I worked on paying bills and figuring out my finances, I would get so confused and be in so much pain that I would walk away from my desk saying (in my best Scarlet O’Hara imitation), “I’ll think about it in the morning--tomorrow is another day.”
But I did not have a problem with money. My daughter had a problem with money. She could never account for where her money went or how to save. Then she joined this group called Debtors Anonymous and miracles happened over and over in her life. Visions of moving, of right work, of going back to school--all were realized. She is the person who attracted me into DA. She remains one of my life coaches.
When I looked at my daughter’s miracles, my denial broke. I realized that blaming my late husband got to be a pretty thin excuse after 12 years of widowhood! I got busy and applied the Tools--keeping my numbers, going to meetings, using the phone, becoming aware of the power of credit advertising, and of course having Pressure Relief Meetings. My PRG lady became my sponsor, and a role model for me.
I was never in much debt--not even $1,000. But debt is debt, and guilt and shame were my companions. Gradually I began to voice my visions for retirement, for a smaller place to live, and for travel. Thanks to DA I was able to retire 3 years earlier than I originally planned. I found a condo that suits my lifestyle perfectly. I have traveled extensively at home and abroad. I was able to manage my late mother’s finances with ease and integrity for the last 5 years of her life.
I have been in debt-free recovery for 16 years. Thanks to DA and its Steps and Traditions I have been able to receive the love and guidance of my DA peers, to sponsor and be sponsored, and to give service at the group, Intergroup, and World Service levels. I have learned when and how to say, “No” when it is time for rotation of service. I dedicate a specific amount of money in my spending plan to distribute at meetings and also to go directly to the DA-GSB every month.
Thank you, DA, for fulfilling all of the Promises in my life and bringing me joy and serenity.